I got booooooorrrrred.
It's like my palate isn't sensing the coconut enough anymore, and it's excessively picking up the chocolate flavor, which, if I'm honest, is imperfect. I mean, it tastes like intermediate-quality chocolate, which is still way above a lot of grades of chocolate that I'll eat. It doesn't taste like wax, so it has most candy bars trumped. But, like, it's "spending an extra four dollars on a chocolate bar at the grocer" or "buying Costco brand 'good chocolate'" good, not "took the bus to Oh! Chocolate good."
(An aside: If you can get anywhere near the Greater Seattle Area, GET YOURSELF TO OH! CHOCOLATES ALREADY. Or go to any small-business chocolatier, in whatever area you're in, really. Support the little guys who put in the hard work, and who make at least a few kinds of truffles that require refrigeration to stay fresh for more than a few days. Expired food is gross, sure, but food that expires quickly is awesome BEFORE its expiration date. Anyway.)
As I keep on tasting the coconut ice cream, as my sensitivity to the coconut is dulling and my sensitivity to the cocoa is getting louder, the whole experience has been getting one-note and flat, like trying to drink a glass of coconut milk always ends up after a while. Stupid palate! Stupid, stupid palate! Moving in the opposite direction of how I tell it to move!!!
So...to make up for what my tongue lacks, I sprinkled a bunch of salt on the second half of the pint of chocolate coconut ice cream.
(For setting: I'm watching The Royal Tenenbaums now, and sorting the very same academic articles that I'd mentioned planning to pass out into, in my last blog entry. However, since that last post, I took some legal, prescribed-specifically-to-me-for-homework-which-is-good-because-I'm-doing-homework ADHD medication, and it woke me the fuck up. I'm even concentrating, now! Somewhat! Envision that scene as the one in which this ice cream experience is taking place.)
After adding salt, some thoughts ran through my head:
"Do I eat too much salt?"
"Am I so desensitized to the flavor of salt that I need to dump it on everything, just to taste my food?"
"Salt is hipster ketchup, isn't it? Fuck. Probably. Everything cool has fancy salt in the title, anymore. Like salted caramel whatever, or whatever."
"Salt is the new ketchup."
"Ugh. [Blank] is the new [blank] needs to be used sparingly. Like, if you're a writer, instead of removing one fashion accessory before leaving the house--really, you should add, like, a dozen accessories before leaving the house, and most of them should have little flashing blinkie lights on them, and be shaped like electronic devices--but if you're a writer, remove at one piece of '[blank] is the new [blank]' from whatever you just did. It's over. That television show got the last one. So pack it up, ship it away. The joking new adaptation of the expression is more familiar now than the original expression was. And if the parody is more famous than the original, then the parody no longer works as a parody. It's too late."
"I like that I used salt."
"Yeah, the salt definitely helped."
"Shit! I dropped my spoon!"
"I wonder if my cats will try to steal my ice cream while I'm up, getting a paper towel? Do they like vegan food? They like catnip. I'll bet they'll eat anything, at least a few tastes, because they're bored. It's what I would do in their shoes."
"Shit, am I still typing in my food blog? Dammit! Okay, back to homework. Back to homework."
************
ACTION SHOT FOR VISUAL INTEREST:
I title it "Shut Up, Sigmund Freud" or "Yes, That IS A Hairbursh In The Background."
The End.
For Now.
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